Uncharted territory in Finding the abandonment 'bone'.... A backbone Journalling

the waves of the last few months have had me recognising the link we all have to Abandonment....Not the psychiatric ticked box, but the depth to which it has been incarcerated within us, and locked-in over life times. This has been the energetic trauma atomised into molecules, grouping together to Alchemise into the trauma gene. Calcified into an etheric 'bone-like' substance and secreted somewhere in the body. We cannot let go of this 'bone' because we cannot see it, its is unidentified as being of etheric reality, and its place is deep within us. Its precipitation began with the original seperation from God, Source, or the source of the beginning of life, separated from mother, from planet, from our undefined origins... to be plunged into the motorways of 3d earth, of death and rebirth, each time this perceived separation is recycled and renegotiated. Without a perceptible tangible nourishmnet for our growing, humanity became lost from spiritual origin and became the orphan. Lifetime after lifetime, internal spilling out of this dillemna created the trauma and then created the subconscious panic. Fear of Nature, and the unknown origin of their 'beingness' was the fire to create the motivation to get things going from the times of the cradle that grew humanity. Humans panicked to take shelter inside the stormy realms of each other, and needed society and social groups to become an organised evolution through the percieved choas of nature and then to survive the tribal clashes and competition for food and shelter. Eventually the loudest voices and strongest personality took the leadership roles and humanity continued on that track through our known history of this crazy, dense, 3rd dimensional zone. From the earliest times of 'this'* kind of history the lowest common denominator was helplessness and FEAR. AND our early emotions, not yet given names and definitions, were formed from the crucible of 'early reaction and response' where Knee-jerk reactions of fight, flight and freeze were dutifully constructed by the chemical make up of the body, ensuring the appropriate enzyme production was linked to react within the environment....the raw primal first-reaction to nature and environment was seeded with deep rooted 'abandonment'. Not in a formal acknowledgment, or a discussed emotional sense, but it was as loud as an internal scream from no internal voice. But with no obvious 'Abandonment' cause, humans just populated the earth and, either became one with the earth and allowed that experience to be its 'Mother'**, or negated its parenatage to live as perceived orphans thrown about mercilessly in the waves of a life span undetermined by anything other than death. So then Abandonment, Fear and Death and what we did and felt about those things... became the etheric modification in the bones of the body. Replicated enzyme reaaction as instructed by DNA. Specifically the backbone, and specifically hidden within the energetic area of the spine that binds the backbone to the earth. Most aspects of 'known science'*** that we are allowed to learn and to 'know' about the body, facts such as : the heart is a pump, that 90% of DNA is junk and What is considered normal and healthy for body and mind, WILL eventually come to light as being grossly inadequate or downright wrong. As the new buzz word is trauma and stress grows in its buzz, it is found that PTSD and most, if not all mental health conditions are different disempowering or motivating events that wreak havoc on the individuals life. Me too. I was writing about stress on face book years ago and devouring as much information as i could find on the sympathetic vagus nervous system, at a time when even my doctor had laughed at the idea that stress can cause illness. So now we are in the buzz of trauma on social media, and that is good, and for the last year, 2023 I have been titrating down my experience. I gave up paid work as the stress and health implications were shouting so loud that I had no choice but to get to the bottom of it personally. But it is not a fast exploration because what put it there.... cannot be quickly identified and medicated, or rather should not. So i designated the last 6 months for healing and recovery. Spiritually and ethically and etherically, where you plan to be for your highest good, will be assisted to happen. AND that includes some crunching and stomach turning events, some mad cognitive dissonance and all manner of 'items' on a hidden personal check list to be lived through, observed and integrated and released. This is uncharted territory. And the map made is only quantified or qualified by a persons journalling, or visits to a counsellor, BUT the bigger strides cannot be evidenced in an empiracle way. It is all experiential. It is what it is, AND spiritually, If that is what you need to do.... than nothing else will made availabe to you. Every problem or 'instance' in life now will have a ounce or a measure of it tied up within it, for healing of self...to the uncovering of the self. WE DO THIS to be free from FEAR and the original seed of abandonment (germination of motivation through the medium of conflict and contrast) in order to be the successful superhuman.... that all this craziness has been about. Going from A -Z in a many-lives journey, means most of us are at the stage of debriefing. And like coming back from the war with PSTD, many need hospitilisation and counselling. This is a time that we do this, Uncover the trauma and stress from 3d life, and through all its hang ups and density we get to see our guts...skin and bone, displayed for our personal internal learning process. I decided that for me The last piece of the puzzle is in finding the abandonment bone. So, in september I was churning through self healing, and recovery after a strongly disabling illness conjured in the crucible of stress. So I was taking it easy. and looking at my garden....A ' stomach crunching' instance in that period was having to pay for the asbestos garage in the garden to be taken down and removed. All symbolic by the way. Toxic and damaged, the garage was the construction in the garden that was destroying any peace i take there. The Huge physical effort of emptying the garage of huge piles of junk was bit by bit....the amount of money involved was stressful.....are all analagous to the healing journey.....AND ARE all factors in these instances in life that are part of the symbolic/ metaphysical healing process. Simply put, 'real' life mimics or mirrors whats inside you, to you, on your healing journey. So I was ill at the time but the thing had to come down. So It did...the next problem (lower level) arose: an ugly space, empty and raw, shattered concrete floor still remains. But worse was the 'unseen til now', backbone of a bomb shelter wall that had been hidden. So the next layer down was (and it remains) a 2 foot high remnant of deeply rooted wall of a bomb shelter. This was unobservable until the asbestos garage was finally taken down. It is so deep into the ground, that was its design to be bomb proof. The waved ridges along it are of concrete and cement held for years in is wavey metal corrugated skeleton form. And looks like the remains of a an excavated dinosaur, an excavated back bone. I kept looking at it every day thinking "it is showing me something, what is it showing me" all the while the idea of abandonment was whispering at me. All things mirror or mimic your story on a healing journey.......A Bomb proof shelter, from the war. WAR! WAR. BOMB BOMB BOMB. Trauma Trauma. BONE, Abandoned..... The issue of abandonment is the vulnerabilty that seeds disease and death in sadness OR seeds great motivation. Where Necessity is The MOTHER of invention. Look in the faces of people in any crowd picture of war, any war from any time, and now more so in the latest wars. What is seen is abandonment, where we have become unknowingly, lost in our own abandonment we have abandoned others to theirs. Observable pain and destruction occurring wars where before we were removed from it. it was hidden from us but deeply affected humanity as a whole at its core. Abandonment is no longer hidden, germinating in a hidden place in the backbone, it is being flushed out for all to see, and for all to heal. Two things then. the first is that it is being flushed out through our human systems to be seen, a word that not many people would perhaps NOT identify with, but is an essence deep within the wound of humanity, Abandonment. Angry Frustration fear and despairing, lost overwhelmed, lashing out, defencive aggressive, or.... limping along, alone. Alone in their sadness even in the media loud crowded event of 2023. Abandoned....No Mother, never had a Mother, or Mother has been destroyed, abandonment. So IS IT That the issue of abandonment is the vulnerabilty that seeds disease and death in sadness, and DEATH IS THE POSSIBLE OUTCOME OR ONLY OUTCOME. OR is it the 2nd option, where abandonment seeds great motivation. Where Necessity is The MOTHER of invention. SO what will come out with it. What does this necessitate, what will it's uncovering recover? AND what will 'it' be Mother to ?????. What is to be birthed By its NOW being seen, All be it.... in the form of population locked into trauma, again, and others locked into SHAME again, UGLY and DE HUMANISING. Humans have been dipping into and out of this type of existence for so long and the 'backbone' of war has been carrying evolution away in leaps and bounds, downhill, fast and furious, seeking and searching for where the human in its evolution belongs.... HUMANITY belongs to itself, but NOW it belongs to the new version, healing of its abandonment... And it is the flushing out of it.... that is the Mother that necessitates or motivates that 'finding', to FIND US and to save us, ourselves. Michaela XXX *The history we have been told about. There are other versions of life that say in earlier times, other than those described in our recorded history, humans were always civilised, spiritual and created great lives: They knew who they were, with both knowledge and action in union aligned with a divine higher power. ** Mother is the great Mother, and very early, more spiritual civilisations, bonded with earth and Mother, and had direct knowledge of the sentient nature of Mother earth. The goddess cultures and mysteries alluding to the great life-giving features of the feminine, are tied up with the black void of fertile creation worshipping the power of the feminine. This great power of creation has been punctuating humanities evolution with the appearance on earth by feminine avatars of the goddess, mystic and priestess and wise woman, whereby the raw power allowed Personification of parts of itself throughout history. Then the patriarchy fearing the 'raw power' it wielded, acted to enslave and disempower, denigrate and deny existence of it wherever it raised its head. In so doing, historically, the patriachy chopped off half of the 'truth and balance' on the earth, causing it topple even further into mayhem and chaos. Unleashing new FEARs and the demons created by those fears. ***Known Science, what we are GIVEN to understand, (and we are not given everything) is only a fraction of what is Knowable, and within Huamn containers of knowledge at this time, can probably only be considered either as being a closely guarded mutilevel of secrets and lies, or information and disinformation muddying the waters of burgeonng enlightenment.